Conspiracy Theory: Lindsey Graham
I’m creating a conspiracy theory about Lindsey Graham’s allegiance. Why? Because it’s fun going crazy. I admire the Sarah Palins of the world for straight-up lying to people for fun, so I’m going to join the party and lie one for the team.
Unlike Palin and the conservatives, I’ll actually issue a warning before I state my illogical case.
WARNING: THE FOLOWING THEORY IS AN ASSUMTPION BASED ON VERY LITTLE TRUTH.
South Carolina senator Lindsey Graham has been called a bisexual (because he works “across the isle,” and a RINO (Republican in Name Only) He seems out of touch in the post-Bush conservative world because he’s not, well, crazy like Sharron Angle and Vaughn Ward.
(Quick tangent: Angle is either brilliant or mentally ill. I’m banking on the latter; just look at her eyes and tell me something’s not wrong there. No one and I mean no one in our fragmented media culture would run away from her own press conference or brag about not taking interviews because they would hurt her fundraising ability, but she did. She’s making Harry Reid look good and he’s NEVER looked good. Thanks Sharron!)
So anyway, Graham criticizes the Tea Party in an NY Times interview and now the conservative base doesn’t like him. People know for a fact that Graham works the polls like a stripper on a double-shift. He knows that immigration is a hot-button issue for conservatives, so what does he do?
He comes out and says he wants to repeal the Fourteenth Amendment! Remember folks, the Fourteenth Amendment gives birthright citizenship. Graham talked about how illegals would come here and have a kid just so it could be a citizen.
Some Republican congressmen and senators followed in Graham’s footsteps and wanted to amend the Constitution to stop the “anchor babies.” It is now an issue conservatives have to decide on when they’re campaigning.
This leads me to the conspiracy…Lindsey Graham HATES the Republican Party and wants Democrats to win the midterm elections.
Don’t you think Graham is angry with Republicans for not backing him up when the Tea Party was bashing him? There has to be some resentment there, right? Of course there is and Graham is in a perfect position to throw a monkey-wrench into his own party’s momentum heading into November. He isn’t up for reelection for another two years.
Maybe he sees where his party is going, farther and farther right. There’s already a political logjam in Washington and just imagine if people like Marco Rubio and Angle were in the Senate? Nothing would get done! Graham is essentially giving Democrats more fodder for them to make the case that conservatives are crazy and out of touch.
Graham can always back down from his position before his reelection, but now he looks like a hero among conservative base. Do they know it takes a 2/3 vote in the Senate to amend the Constitution and that it will never happen? It doesn’t matter!
This is a win-win for the Graham-dy man if his fake political posturing brings out even more loons in his own party for liberals to hammer. A well-respected, intelligent Republican in a party full of morons taking a crazy stance on immigration is just the type of thing someone would do if they wanted to bring down their party from the inside. Ladies and gentlemen, here’s your conservative double-agent.
Hey, maybe I’m wrong and this is just a conspiracy theory…
