The Steroid-Lite Era
“The night is always darkest just before the day…and the dawn is coming.”
-Harvey Dent
The sun is climbing over the horizon and morning dew is starting to glisten. It’s almost dawn and a new day is just about here. Changes are coming; heck, some are being seen today. Baseball fans everywhere looking for multiple 50 home run seasons are going to be sorely disappointed. Scouts who overrate left handed power hitting prospects are going to be disappointed.
The Steroid-Lite era has arrived.
No more amphetamines and no more anabolic steroids mean less power. It’s a huge advantage for pitchers such as Stephen Strasburg who throws 100 mph. Hitters will struggle to catch up with heat like that if they’re not juiced up. Amphetamines jack up your heart rate, allowing hitters to react faster. That’s good news for Starbucks, who can open up a stand in every MLB clubhouse. Triple-shots of espresso before every at-bat! Combine that with all the tobacco players chew and you’ve got a dangerous combination of nicotine and caffeine pumping through the bodies of major league players. Maybe the Janitor from “Scrubs” was on the right track when he invented the “smoke-achino.”
Players will always look for some edge, even if it’s not a legitimate one. Major leaguers are some of the most superstitious people on the planet. They won’t wash their socks or their underwear during long winning streaks. Jason Giambi even sported a porno mustache and wore women’s underwear. Jon Neise couldn’t heed the advice of Sandy Koufax when Koufax told him to stand on a different side of the rubber when he pitched. Neise felt weird and thought his pitches were tailing off. Baseball coaches often have a tough time coaching players because of their eccentricities. The players will try to cheat their way out of this and it won’t work unless they all jump on the HGH bandwagon. Guys aren’t getting caught for HGH usage because they don’t test for it. They are testing players for stuff that you’d take coming off a cycle of HGH. Steroid testing is on the right track.
One thing is for sure, though, pitchers are gaining an advantage. Some of it has to do with the lack of juice and some if has to do with coaches getting a better understanding of who they’re facing. The Mets have three lefties in their rotation and two in their bullpen. The Phillies, the Mets’ biggest rival, have a lineup full of lefties. It’s not a coincidence. In fact, it seems like there’s more left handed pitchers out there than in previous years, making it easier to get the drop on lefty power-bats.
Some teams are rifling through their minor league systems looking for south paws to plug into their bullpen. They don’t need to be the most electric pitchers. They just need to be able to get other lefties out. As of June 11, there is no lefty in the top 9 in home runs. Makes you think that maybe the league has adjusted. Florida’s Mike Stanton certainly looks a lot more valuable.
Home run totals are down, so what? Chicks dig the long ball and now chicks are going to have to dig the strikeout or the inning-ending double play. Real baseball is making a comeback and games are going to be quicker. An emphasis will be put on guys hitting for average and baserunning ability will be a prime commodity. American League managers might have to start giving the steal sign because a three-run homer may not come.
The Steroid-Lite era is going to be more fun than you’d expect.
